• Dear Aunt Flo

    Listen, I think it’s great that you consider visiting me each month.  But, I have to be honest with you, I really don’t like when you do. You are like those extended family members that I prefer only to see twice a year around the holidays and even that is two times too many. In…

  • Dear Doorknobs

    The whole reason I shut and turned your lock is so that when I get out of the shower and I’m buck naked trying to dry off and do my after shower beauty regimen, you would keep out the bickering. Finding myself quickly covering the goods as two children enter the room tattling about how…

  • Dear Walmart

    There are so many things about you that drive me crazy. I believe that relationships should be open and honest. If we’re going to continue with… whatever this is we have going, you really should know these things.  First, do you know how germy you are? You gaining more money by having a pharmacy in…

  • Dear Life

    What a journey you have been on thus far. I wish I could say it has been a walk in the poppy fields of Southern California on a beautiful spring day where the sky is blue with the softest puffs of white clouds. Alas, it was not to be. Had you been, what lessons would…